I have an 11-year-old, who is beginning puberty – Frequently, her rationale is going out the window. The smallest think at school can be blown out to a full drama complete with hysterics and tantrums. It’s challenging, sometimes hilarious and it takes all of my will to stay calm and not escalate with her.
Now, this innocent example of puberty will be understood by any parent who has raised children. What I noticed this week was how adults, can behave exactly the same, and yet they don’t recognise their drama as the same behaviour of pubescent children.
I’m coming in passionately on this one – I will preface this by saying that I have been learning this lesson for a long time and I’m not perfect at all, but as I age – I loathe drama.
We all know people who seem to thrive on it, create trouble in all of their relationships and then try to rope others along with them so that they can feel good, justified, powerful. People who seem to delight in the escalation of small things – creating mountains out of molehills – How big is a mole hill anyway? ……………sorry I digress………………There are also the people who create drama just to be able to justify their prophecies – I told you so…..etc.
But is that the pay off?? Let’s look at what it really does:
In the business world you’re really as good as your relationships. Relationships with colleagues, peers, customers and suppliers. Everyone knows everyone in the business community – the degrees of separation are only 1 or 2 at best. So dial down your drama. Strive to keep your relationships clear and honest. There are many business owners in our community that I have known for many years – It’s so important to have mutual respect. If you did find yourself near a drama – RUN…… fast as you can, but if you can’t………. Check facts. Have the integrity or insight to ask someone to help you understand. Look at your own past history and what you know about people before you buy into someone else’s experience. For petes sake don’t jump to conclusions – Guilty of that I have been in the past.
And lastly and possibly most important, whatever drama you’re having with someone, don’t try and rope other people into taking sides or giving opinions. Everyone has their own relationships with people. Recognise that your experience with someone might not be the same for you as others.
It’s tricky, I’m not saying it easy, but it’s important. Relationships on even keels sail much further, much longer and can be relied upon for a very long time.
Until next week, massive hugs
Andy xx
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